Have things been terrible between you and your spouse? Perhaps they have cheated more than once? When a marriage is broken, it can be exceptionally difficult to move forward. If you are about to get a divorce, you might wonder what you can do to have a successful one.
Divorce is extremely hard emotionally. The less stress you have with getting an annulment, the better.
Follow these 9 keys for a successful divorce.
Key 1: Make sure of what you want.
Do you honestly want a divorce? Have you tried everything to make your marriage work, including counseling? An important step in getting divorced is making sure that you are really sure that this is what you want. If you are 100% certain that there is no hope for your marriage, then you can begin the divorce process.
Key 2: What do you need exactly?
With having a successful divorce, you will need to know exactly what you need. This will take time and patience. If you need a lawyer, because you are unsure of how to go about filing for a divorce, then get one. You could also go online and do a bit of research. Can you get an online divorce by using an authorized company? Do you need a lawyer? A mediator? Have you thought about child custody? Make a list of everything that you need and want out of your divorce. With deciding, having a list in front of you will help you plan wisely.
You might also have to work out a budget to see how much money you will need to survive after your divorce. Start budgeting. If you are unsure of how to budget, you can always see a financial planner.
Perhaps you might need to find a job after your divorce; if this is the case, start looking for work now.
If your kids are struggling to cope with your divorce, perhaps they need to see a therapist. Or if you are struggling emotionally, then seeing a counselor may be what you need to help you through this hard time.
So with having a successful divorce, make sure to really think about what you need. If you know what you need, then you can move forward successfully. By being prepared, the entire process will also be easier.
Key 3: Know what you have.
With having a successful divorce, make sure you know exactly what’s going on with your assets and debts. If you don’t know what you have, then you won’t be able to divide your assets, or even debts accordingly. What is your monthly income? What are your monthly expenses? Do you have any policies that need to be paid? How much debt do you have? Do you know how much your house is worth? If you don’t, then have a realtor come to give you an evaluation. This will help you prepare for your divorce, and to also make things easier, when it comes to dividing your assets and debts with your spouse.
Key 5: Be prepared
If you are prepared, then your divorce will be successful. Make a list of all the questions you would like to ask a lawyer. If you do this, then you will save time and money. If you know what you want to ask, then the process will be easier. This will also help you have your thoughts in order. With getting a divorce, you might be very emotional, so having everything on paper will help you to think logically.
With preparation, don’t just choose the first lawyer. Do your homework, ask around and compare prices. This will help you make wise choices with choosing an affordable lawyer, but also an experienced one.
Be prepared for a whole mix of emotions too. You will feel anger, sadness, resentment, confusion. This is normal. Divorce is heartbreaking most of the time. So prepare yourself for mixed emotions and know that it is okay to feel the way you do.
Key 6: Be realistic
In order for your divorce to be successful, you need to be realistic as to what you can get out of your divorce. Perhaps you want it all; house, cars, kids, money. Even if your spouse is to blame for everything, the chances of this happening are highly unlikely. They divide most of the time between spouses. Be prepared that you won’t get every single thing that you want. By being realistic, you won’t be disappointed if you don’t get absolutely everything you want during the process.
Key 7: Focus on yourself
It is easy to think about everyone else during a divorce, but during this time, you also need to focus on yourself and your heart. Make sure you are around people who love you. During this hard time, you will need their support. Try to keep busy as well. It is easy to become depressed, so if you are busy doing things that you enjoy doing, it can help make the divorce process a little easier. Try to take care of your health by eating healthy food and exercising. Even a short walk every day can do wonders for your mental health. If your depression gets out of control, seeing a doctor for medication can also help you with coping.
Key 8: Be there for your children if you have children.
It’s easy to become so wrapped up in your own heartache, that you begin to neglect your kids. Try to be there for them too. Your children are also hurting, and they will need you to be strong for them. This is a very hurtful and confusing time for kids. They will feel a whole mix of emotions and insecurity. The more you are there to support them, the easier your divorce will be on them.
Key 9: Don’t rush into a new relationship
This is important. In order for your divorce to be successful, don’t rush into a new relationship. In some states, this could affect the outcome of your hearing. But besides that, rushing into a new relationship, while the hurt is still raw, is asking for trouble. You might think it will be a good distraction from the pain, but a new relationship could just set you up for more heartache. Take your time to heal and find yourself again.
The heartache a person experiences from a broken marriage is devastating. It might worry you that your divorce won’t be successful or how you can even get through it. But if you follow these keys to a successful divorce, then this will help you through.